"Serious", he said. 11/04/10

Goosebumps.
Shaky hands.
Deep breathing.
Pulsing heartbeat.

Let's play this guessing game...Are you thinking what I'm thinking? I'm not even sure what I'm thinking --But I hope you aren't thinking it.
What do you mean?you think but won't sell me your thoughts.It makes me think more...But I wouldn't sell you these thoughts... no, not these.
So many questions unasked.
So many sentences left unfinished;
Words too afraid to escape.
So I come to my God, my escape...

God, what is it You want?!
I'm tired of backing away from that question.
Doing so will only make it worse.
I'm tired of pushing away this nagging thought.

God, my heart is Yours...
But some part of it doesn't want to let go
of the blessing You've given.
It doesn't seem like much of a blessing now anyway...

Lord, your thoughts are far above mine.
You work all things together for my good.
You planned out this time for my life.
You thought about it carefully.

So I think of You,
and Your plan, not my own.
Your will, and not my own.
Your life...not my own.